A Special Thanksgiving - 11/25/09

I haven't written in this blog for awhile.
For awhile it was my life.
I had a need to write what was going on...
Now...
I know I should end this blog and be done with it.
But, I've promised friends I would keep writing until the last fundraiser was done.

The reality has really sunk in now.
I see the pain on Stephanie's face.
I see the questions in Matthew's eyes.
And, maybe I'm selfish, but my heart hurts...
It just aches.
Like a real pain.
Feeling a little bit lost.

Missing Gary so much.
He really was bigger than life.
He wasn't perfect - that's for sure.
And, we would argue all the time.
But, he knew I loved him.
And, I know he loved me.
That's what counts.
No regrets.
No "what if's"
God had another plan for Gary.
Nothing we could do.

And, tomorrow is Thanksgiving.
Gary's (and my Dad's) favorite Holiday.
He loved cooking the turkey, making his special stuffed mushrooms, and watching football.
Every year we would take a picture of him with a napkin sticking out of his mouth.
Don't know when it started - at least 20 years ago.
And, when we couldn't be together.
We would stick napkins in our mouths, take pictures, and send them to him.
Strange I know....

Gary and I were the only ones who knew how to make the "bouvier" stuffing.
It's with ground beef and can actually be made into a sandwich after Thanksgiving.
We really don't have a receipe - but this year I'm going to try and write something down to pass along to Kate.. Can't let it end with me....

And so the Holidays will come and go.
Families will get together and count their blessings.

This year, I have a lot of blessings.

My friends.
They are more than friends, they are truly family.
Always there.
Always supportive.

My family.
Terry has been beside me and doesn't even need to say anything.
I know he's there.
Kate....
What can I say about my daughter?
Love doesn't even come close.
She is so special.

So, this Thanksgiving, do me a favor.

Hug just a little tighter and longer.

Listen...
Listen to those around you and learn something that you didn't know about that person.

And, most of all really, really be thankful for what you have.
At that moment.
On that day.

Wishing you all a wonderful Thanksgiving.